Annual Business and Leadership Conference for Women in Pennsylvania

Take Action Against the Language of Fat
by Jessica Weiner

Are you waiting to be skinnier, thinner, more toned, more tanned, better dressed, more lovable, sexier, nicer, smarter, funnier or wealthier before you begin your life? Millions of us are. And it's a complete waste of time. Body obsession and the quest for perfection are destroying our lives.

After spending over 15 years traveling across the country, speaking to women and girls about their body image, I have come to discover destructive language women speak; I call it the "Language of Fat". No matter body shape or size, it is the overall title for a general sense of uneasiness and dissatisfaction in our lives. I choose to translate the word "FAT" to really mean: feelings, action, thoughts.

When we are not fulfilled in our jobs, relationships, friendships or self-esteem, we focus on the external- because that seems more within our realm of control and influence. We have to think about what's going on inside, too.

Your health, wealth, family, relationships and career are all affected by how you speak about your body. It seeps into other areas of your life because body image is about your self-image and how you imagine your life should be. So let's choose our words carefully and think before we speak!

Here are some tips and tools for avoiding using the "Language of Fat" in your life.

Recognize that the Language of Fat is not really about food, fat or weight. Recognize that it is really all around you, in subtle and not so subtle ways.
Commit to keeping a notebook or journal to explore this issue. I find that writing things down really helps to attain clarity, and it will be one of the primary tools in your toolbox.
Begin listening to the language around you and to the language you speak. Do you find yourself repeating a phrase or word that has a negative connotation? Begin to write down the most commonly repeated phrases.
For three days keep track of the number of times you use the words "fat" and "ugly". Also keep track of whom you say these words to. Do you say them to yourself? A boyfriend? A friend?
Begin to record some of the emotions that come up when you are speaking the Language of Fat. You don't have to be any more specific than writing down "pissed", "hungry", "hurt" whatever.
Decide if you are willing to take a deeper look into your own use of the Language of Fat. If so, get ready to recommit your willingness on a daily basis.
Go easy on yourself. It's just the beginning.

Author, advice columnist and teen expert Jessica Weiner will be a featured speaker in the Conference's Young Women's Program and will discuss how today's young women can navigate through relationships, body image, career advice and cyber-bullying with their self-esteem in tact! This article is an excerpt from her book "Life Doesn't Begin 5 Pounds From Now" (Simon Spotlight Entertainment 2007). For more tips and tools please visit www.withjess.com.

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